Myths about marriage originate mostly from home and our own culture and society one of the commonest myths is that your partner will always know what’s on your mind without having to tell them.
In other cases you grow up seeing your parents argue, yelling and hurling all sorts of unspeakable insults at each other. Growing up around all this can make you think marriage is all about quarrels and condemning your partner only results in one. The issue with myths is that we take them for solid facts and they end up ruining relationships.
This article will expose some of the common myths about getting married and were here to clear them with you.
- Couples therapy is for broken marriages
Marriages don’t have to be broken first before couples can go for therapy. This is a common misconception that people have. They think that seeking help early or before getting married means the relationship is failing. During marriage therapy, the aim isn’t to save a bad marriage but rather to reveal the truth about the relationship and help couples understand each other.
- You need to stay with your first to test if the marriage will succeed
Cohabiting shouldn’t be the basis of finding out if you should spend the rest of your life with your partner. On the contrary, living together with your partner before marriage is what causes problems. Cohabiting or trial marriages have been associated with more negatives than positives. According to research eight out of ten couples will break up before an actual marriage happens or divorce after marriage. Sometimes couples will discover that the trial marriage isn’t as easy as they thought, so end up separating.
- Wedding rings are really expensive but don’t need to be
The myth that wedding rings are expensive is not true. What is true however is the fact that your metal choice determines how much the ring will cost? It’s only recently that platinum was considered the most expensive among precious metals. In 2020, the price of gold rings has also risen to match that of platinum rings. The thing with most metals is that their prices fluctuate due to availability and season. If these are expensive, there are options like plain wedding rings. They are simple in design and don’t have the embellishment of diamonds. Plain rings are the most affordable. Even with them, prices are largely driven by the amount of precious metal. Also, the thicker the band and ring size the more expensive it. We recommend visiting the wedding rings Dublin website for some affordable rings that look the part.
- Getting married solves all your problems
For couples or individuals facing problems before marriage, if unaddressed those problems will instead be carried on into your marriage. Marriage shouldn’t be seen as a place where you can run to when you’re facing challenges. It may feel as though all your problems are disappearing when you get married, but quite the contrary they always pop back. Having problems, however, shouldn’t stop you from settling down. Just don’t expect your troubles to go away. The best way to deal with them once you’re married is by talking about them with your spouse, that way a solution can be found.
- Good marriages come naturally
Even the best of friendships need work; it wouldn’t be nice to think that good marriages come naturally. They also experience good times and bad times. It’s never a straight line and honestly, there’s a lot you can expect. You must work on your problems as a couple. Before getting married take time to learn what your spouse’s virtues are and them yours vice versa. Also, don’t forget to remind yourself how much you love them.
- Never go to bed angry
Never going to bed angry is probably one of the most common myths about marriage. Couples do fight from to time and sometimes problems don’t get solved right before you both go to bed. It’s okay to go to bed even if you’re still angry. Rather than forcing yourself to talk, carry on with your activities and talk whenever you feel ready. Talking about it in the morning when you have a clear head is much better.
- You need to have common interests
Dating sites such as Match.com and LoveFlutter ask users to provide their lists of interests to help attract potential mates. The key here however doesn’t lie in sharing common interests rather it’s how the two couples interact with each other while doing it. For example, if both of you enjoy playing tennis, but during the game, a partner says, “you idiot, that’s not how they do it”. Negative criticism such as the one expressed in this statement is in fact what could lead to a divorce or having problems in the future.
- Your partner completes you
You have always been your unique self whether before you met your partner or after marriage. The myth that your partner completes you is a misconception. What is true is that your partner compliments you but not completes you. Come to think of it you don’t need someone else to be able to feel complete. You only need them to complement what is already there.
- Affairs are the main cause of divorce
Another misconception about marriage that needs to change is this one. Tolerating a unfaithful partner indeed is too much to ask from anyone but it’s not the only reason that would drive a couple towards divorce. Affairs destroy the foundation of trust on which the relationship was built but divorce typically ushers in the affair. Couples participate in affairs usually because of loneliness. This means one is driven to have an affair even before the affair itself happens.
Regarding the many common myths about marriage, it’s best if you don’t take in whatever myths people have to say about getting married because most of them aren’t true. Also, do not expect not to have problems in marriage because most relationships aren’t perfect. Rather, what you need to do is to try to listen, act kindly and loving towards your partner.